The immortality of the status quo

The immortality of the status quo.

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The immortality of the status quo

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Once Upon a Time.”

Once upon a time there was a fairy warrior called Annabelle. She was a tiny,fiercely independent fairy with pale pink wings and a waterfall of brown luscious locks. There was also the arch angel Asriel, whom advised the treasury on trade and industry.

Annabelle and Asriel had met on a random day in  a quiet meadow when both had gone there to enjoy a summer afternoon and ponder on life’s silent, yet pressing questions. It seemed that fate had conspired against them, because as they bumped into each other between the sunflowers, they started talking like they were old friends.

It soon became apparent that this chance encounter had the potential to blossom into something truly spectacular. They were like Anam Cara’s – Stars created by the sparks of God’s heart as he watched  the love between beings. They were intertwined into each other’s hearts and souls, thoughts and the very essence of being.

There was one problem with Annabelle and Asriel’s happy ending – Kalen. The age old tradition of families who married off their children to each other. Kalen and Annabelle had been friends from an early age and it was only natural that their friendship turned into an innocent romance. Kalen and Annabelle’s parents thought this romance to be the next wedding to add to the family empire and the plans were quickly put in place. Annabelle and Kalen were to be married as soon as their training for their guilds were completed.

Annabelle had been content with this arrangement as she and Kalen got along well and could laugh togeteher, though she often wondered whether the love she had read of in old fairy literature was just a myth. Every now and again when her fears and questions seemed to become too real she would admonish herself and look over at Kallen, thinking about his caring nature and how she was just being silly.

Until she bumped into Asriel in the meadow and everything changed. A few weeks down the line and Annabelle was headlocked into a personal hell. She had never know that one’s very own heartbeat could beat so in tune in exact time with another. Yet, she had been promised to Kalen, a good man. A man who cared for her and with whom she could laugh.

Asriel had become distant lately. He had shown and promised Annabelle everything he could should she jump… Annabelle had wanted to jump, but she was on the edge of the cliff, still looking over her shoulder every now and again. Asriel felt like he was starting to resent Annabelle for making him love her by looking at him like he was her sun, by loving her and she had shown and said it back and yet she had still been with Kalen as if all were right with them.

Annabelle realised Asriel was starting to push her away, and it pained her to the extent where she felt paralyzed. She wanted so much to bask in the rays of his affection but she was also scared of her family’s wrath…and what if she threw it all away for something not meant to last.

Annabelle had a training assignment in the Kingdom of Brazil, in a place called Rio De Janeiro. As her training wore on, she would stand and watch the sunset drop away in the ocean at twilight and she soon realized it was only of Asriel that she thought when she wanted to share news from Rio, and alas the wonderful truth set itself free in a letter composed by Annabelle.

The ink on the parchment was a copy of Annabelle’s heart sent to Asriel to tell him that she loved him, and to wait for her at the portal of entry as she returned from her training assignment so that they could start afresh – A real chance to let their passion come alive.

On the day of her return, Annabelle jumped through the portal excitedly only to find a short letter on the other side. Asriel hadn’t waited as Annabelle had asked but had instead written that the time it had taken Annabelle to make a decision, had been the grave where all his affection and love had been buried in,  and now all that remained was to mourn at its tombstone every now and again for an opportunity never lived.

Annabelle’s soul then turned off it’s lights and on it’s walls, blazing with might were these written words:

“These violent delights have violent ends
And in their triumph die, like fire and powder
Which, as they kiss, consume”

Everybody’s got a hungry heart

You’re sitting at a café when a stranger approaches you. The person asks what your name is; and for some reason you reply. The stranger nods “I’ve been looking for you”.

What happens next?

I search the stranger’s face for any conspicuous mark or line that sparks a memory flint into flame….. I find none. He sits down in the opposite chair and sends a lazy smile across the table, waiting expectedly. I search his face again and I’m accosted by his eyes. Brown hazel nut pools flecked with tiny emeralds and in the margins of his eyes I read the side note he’s scribbling: Come away with me.

I don’t know him, but boy with those eyes I’d like to know him. I give myself a stern talk: “You’re not a 16 year old teen who’s never been kissed. You’re a successful lawyer. Pull it together”. So I paint the “I’m-in-control-and-cool-about-it” expression on my face with a slow confident smile like a woman who’s seen this scene play out too many times.  “If you’ve been looking for the person who can put you in your place, then yes I am who you’ve been looking for” I say with a smug smile.

A wild laugh trickles from his left dimple, “Yes indeed you are who I’ve been looking for. I don’t believe in wasting opportunities and we I saw you here today, I could just tell by the way you ordered your coffee that I have been bored by mundane girls for far too long.”

I want to smirk and arch an eyebrow, but the blatant honesty of the statement awakes long forgotten butterflies. I am not too old for this? I want to say something clever but he eyes linger on my mouth and I wonder have I woken-up in wonderland?

“You wear expensive shoes. Your hair looks amazing. You’re not a lady. You’re a full red hot blooded woman who doesn’t jump but leaps. You are structure and you are order. But I could also tell by the way you looked off distantly into the street daydreaming that in your head you’re not some boss. You’re barefoot and singing, giving in to a passion too great for your control. You’re burn with desire. You take chances and you’re longing for that one thing or one person to run wild with you. Two completely different people in one soul and heart – Fascinating”

Is this a book, has he read my diary? Has he climbed into my very soul? I left that girl behind long ago…. There is no time or space for freedom in success. Yet his words has slam-dunked into my heart, and I feel like I could take his hand and run away or maybe more like just running away 100 miles in the opposite direction…… but suddenly I’m scared someone will never look at me like that again, while I’m sitting at a café drinking coffee, wondering if I’ll ever experience the mad hatter’s party again? I’m afraid suddenly, so afraid that I call the waiter and ask for the bill. So afraid that my eyes linger on his lips and my hand writes poetry on his wrist…….

He sees her smile, the naked longing for freedom trapped in her hands playing along his wrist and he knows “I got her”. Everyone is trapped nowadays, and wants to believe that movies come true. So he plays whoever they look for, and in return he gets his named splashed upon the front page of the newspaper tomorrow, he wonders what it will read this time?

“Scarf killer sentences lawyer to death in San Francisco”

 

All you need is love, or do you?

I spy

On 7 July 1965, “The Beatles”gave a voice to the unsung, silent desire of almost every human being, when they released their smashing single “All you need is love”.

Or did they?

I am not saying that being in-love, married or in some sort of relationship is the ultimate pinnacle of happiness, but most people do seem to long for “that someone” or “that feeling”.

Romance leaves its fingerprints quite clearly for all to see: A girlfriend will have that spark in her eye, talk about him all the time. Your mate will buy her flowers, send her texts, stay home because she asks. You can observe it in the way they look at each other. The question is, what happens when the initial “romance” wears off, the sexual tension fades, and what’s left are two human beings who now have to keep working at it if they…

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All you need is love, or do you?

On 7 July 1965, “The Beatles” gave a voice to the unsung, silent desire of almost every human being, when they released their smashing single “All you need is love”.

Or did they?

I am not saying that being in-love, married or in some sort of relationship is the ultimate pinnacle of happiness, but most people do seem to long for “that someone” or “that feeling”.

Romance leaves its fingerprints quite clearly for all to see: A girlfriend will have that spark in her eye, talk about him all the time. Your mate will buy her flowers, send her texts, stay home because she asks. You can observe it in the way they look at each other. The question is, what happens when the initial “romance” wears off, the sexual tension fades, and what’s left are two human beings who now have to keep working at it if they want to make it last?

Does true love really exist? The better question is do we really know what true love means?

The first real idea that we form of love is probably our immediate surroundings and circumstances where we are confronted by the behavior of our parents, family and friends. We also watch movies like “The Notebook”, “Titanic”, “A walk to remember”, “Walk the line”, “Sweet November”, “You’ve got mail”, “Sleepless in Seattle”, “Breakfast at Tiffany’s”, “Casablanca”, “Gone with the wind”. We read books written by Nora Roberts, Jane Austen, Emily Bronte, Danielle Steel, or get engrossed by titles like “50 shades of Grey” and “Jane Eyre”.

These books and movies all portray true-love as this breathtaking, heart-stopping moment when you first lay eyes on someone, or as a passionate flame that will always burn; disguised as a “I-hate-you-you-irritate-me-I-could-never-like-you” relationship. The idea of love is portrayed as a connection of mind, body and soul that overtakes you, makes you feel delirious, makes the world spin. It’s shown as emotions that you just can’t control, that leads you to that one moment where you just know he or she is “The One”.

You listen to your family and friends talk about love, you think about your previous relationship, and slowly you build a puzzle in your mind of what love’s supposed to look like.

Suddenly you meet someone…. You just walked up the stairs and you saw him/her standing there and your heart stops, you can barely focus. You feel like you’re walking on air, but as you get to know the person those initial feelings wear off and you find yourself after another mediocre date asking: “What was I thinking?”. You will meet someone again, be friends for a while and as you become better acquainted see all the wonderful qualities that you want in a spouse or lover, yet sometimes something feel missing or it feels like other people still prickle your interest and you wonder: “This person has everything I could ever want in someone, why would I want anything more?”

Do movies and books simply give us an ideological picture of love that doesn’t truly exist? Do we confuse love with lust or do we simply get bored to quickly and forget that love takes hard work. Why do people cheat? Are they truly unhappy and unfulfilled or are they simply disillusioned. A few views on the matter:

1.

As the years pass your lover, wife/husband will not be as enticing as that first few months. You will have to get up each day and decide to love that person anew, and ask yourself what you can do today to show your lover you still appreciate them and find them interesting. You have to work at the relationship everyday to keep the “spark” alive. It will not always be a “wide-eyed and bushy-tailed” situation, get used to it and “man-up”.

2.

If the initial passion, romance and interest will eventually wane, why does it matter at all? You can simply choose someone who possesses the qualities you find redeeming, who doesn’t irritate you too much, who will remember to bring you flowers every now and again, who loves you and whom you love back but in a non complicated unmessy way that just generally makes you happy.

3.

When you meet the person you will just know that it is the “one”, or somewhere along the line you will realize that the specific person is the one.

if it isn’t enough that one has to consider all of that, and whether it is love or lust, one can also have a condition called “Limerence” which is an involuntary state of mind which results from a romantic attraction to another person combined with an overwhelming, obsessive need to have one’s feelings reciprocated.

Recent studies also show that a woman’s love is fickle, because they thrive on attention: As soon as their own relationship starts to wane, they can quickly fall in-love with another charmer even if they have been in a long term relationship.

What if you are a driven passionate person, who just wants another passionate being to raise 3 kids with? Is it too much to ask, does it even exist or are you doomed to a life of disappointment and broken relationships, unless you make yourself smaller so you hand can fit into another person’s.

There are also countless articles about what time to have the “right” relationship. Apparently your twenties is a bad time for a relationship, since you are still growing and changing? But what about your 30’s and 40’s when you change jobs, kids grow up, you make new friends, face new challenges? Don’t you change too?

If we have to consider all of this, is there really such a thing as true-love or do we simply have to learn to co-exist with another human being? Can someone ever for fill you JUST ENOUGH, that you never feel like another no matter how enticing can ever rip you away from your partner?

If passion fades, why do we still look away from our partner, or try to find that “feeling” of a lightning strike or chemistry attack? Why aren’t we more sensible about love, relationships and feelings.

If it doesn’t exist why do producers and writers keep selling the idea of breathless moments to us?

How, with all these considerations, do you choose someone to spend the rest of your life with?

And if it’s so damn hard: Why do we try at all?

Why don’t we just learn to be alone?

The dangerous nationalism of Julius Malema

I have recently been spending a lot of time in the South African political and economic history books. It grinds me to the bone that we have swam through such a bloody river to get where we are, just to sit back with hands folded and have such an apathetic attitude towards the issues in our country . We are faced with challenges of poverty, unemployment, high levels of corruption and low levels of service delivery. The dangers of Julius’ Nationalistic ideas are evident.

All South Africans should be staying informed and starting to think for themselves. The youth should think about the future they want for South Africa: The kind of South Africa they want to work in, and want to raise their their kids in. They should start acting like they care about the history that got us here, and how to better this country.

We should not be fighting each other, we should be fighting together for a better future.

Johan Fourie's blog

No laughing matter: nationalism is a dangerous game Photo: Refilwe Modise No laughing matter: Nationalism is a dangerous game. Photo: Refilwe Modise (The Citizen)

It’s ironic that Julius Malema, in his first speech in parliament yesterday, would reference Louis Botha, the first Prime Minister of the Union of South Africa. Here is what Mr Malema had to say about Botha:

This elite pact is reflected by the fact that the most prominent statue in this Parliament, is a statue of Louis Botha, and the one of Nelson Mandela is very small and is hidden behind the statue of Louis Botha. Louis Botha is not our Hero and cannot be a Hero of a democratic South Africa. He is a colonial warmonger, who fought for the exclusion of black and indigenous people from running their own country and affairs. Its people like this who made white South Africans think they are superior and if we continue celebrating them, we are equally…

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My favourite things……

favorite_things

Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens
Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens
Brown paper packages tied up with strings
These are a few of my favorite things

When the dog bites
When the bee stings
When I’m feeling sad
I simply remember my favorite things
And then I don’t feel so bad

Ah, Sound of Music! One of my favourite musicals of all time. I know every line of every song, and when I watch the movie, I instantly become sixteen again and I’m hanging onto Julie Andrews’ every word of advice in the “I am sixteen going on seventeen” reprise. No matter how many times I’ve watched it, I still makes me laugh. I root for Captain Von Trapp and Maria and every time it makes me believe in the whole good-natured idea of love.

Watching it, is like a burst of summer sun through your window – It just makes you feel good.

A dose of feel good, something everyone needs from time to time to remember why we rush around like lunatics, work till our eyes hurt, persevere when we really just don’t want to fight another time. It can be an apocalypse out there when you simply don’t have the energy or the will to try to see the beauty of life through all the craziness anymore.

Maybe it’s as simple as remembering your “favourite things”. Maybe it’s worth it to remember what makes you happy: Your favourite things might just be the extra burst of energy, the hand out of the darkness, the warmth in the cold. Maybe remembering your favourite things is the tool that helps you today to be your extraordinary self, instead of being someone’s version of your ordinary self.

Here are a list of my favourite things that get me going, comment and share your favourite things and remember to take a minute to induldge in them every now and again – It keeps you going

Summer: 
Lazy summer afternoons outside, blue summer skies, sunny mornings….SUMMER in general

Coffee:
A cup after a long or difficult day = Heavan

Late night conversations:
Late night conversations with a best friend or someone close usually means a lot of laughter or insight

Dresses: 
There is nothing like buying a pretty dress and feeling like a real lady or a Disney princess

Service to others:  
Helping anyone in any way reminds me about the true purpose of life

Randomness:
Random ideas, dates or get-together’s make the most amazing memories

Adrenaline Rush:
A swim in the ocean, riding bike, going on a rollercoaster….getting the blood going is the best way to
feel alive.

A Good book:
Nothing like reading something that makes you want to keep reading or captures your imagination or
that makes you think. Words capture something inside you that nothing else can.

Dancing in my room while brushing my teeth or getting ready:
No one is EVER TOO OLD to dance around in your pj’s to a good tune while getting ready. It sets you
up in a great mood for the rest of the day.

Remember to have a day filled with your favourite things….. Being happy makes everything else seem worth it!